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Chuckles

 
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Merri



Joined: 21 Jun 2007
Posts: 30


Location: Victoria, Australia

PostPosted: Thu Jun 21, 2007 1:22 pm    Post subject: Chuckles Reply with quote

CHUCKLES

Chuckles are charming. Not gay, for gaiety brings loud and full-chested laughter, or girlish sounds, clear and high like musical notes. Chuckles are charming, warm and tender, never meant to harm or hurt.

So chuckle away, like clear water gently rippling over white stones. Over years the stones are worn away by chuckling water. Cold hard stone stands rock solid against the chuckles, never knows it is being worn away, for chuckles are charming.

Other waters lie serene, blue and mirror still, or rage, lashing out in violent waves, or grey and cold endure with silent strength. And water laughs. Fountains, full of gaiety, leap and laugh in the sunshine, delighting to shine and sparkle with light. Listen, there is laughter, deep and strong. And listen, musical sounds peal clear and high. Dancing and laughing they make fun of life, of you and me.

But sometimes water chuckles gently, rippling over white stones, flowing over fern shaded rocks. Cool clear water chuckles warm, cool and warm, warm and cool. Cold hard stone stands rock-solid amidst the chuckles, never knows it is gradually being charmed.


Last edited by Merri on Mon Jun 25, 2007 12:08 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Twiggy



Joined: 08 Jun 2007
Posts: 34


Location: Australia

PostPosted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 10:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quite novel, the way you have connected water and chuckling, and kept a tight focus. It would have been spoiled by letting it ramble as it easily could have done. I would however put a hyphen in "Cold hard stone stands rock-solid". Smile

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Merri



Joined: 21 Jun 2007
Posts: 30


Location: Victoria, Australia

PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2007 12:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes, I could have written a lot more about chuckles, but once I'd linked them to water I felt I wanted to keep that focus.
And thanks, the hyphen will go in. Smile
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admin
Site Admin


Joined: 23 Jan 2007
Posts: 68


Location: Australia

PostPosted: Mon Jun 25, 2007 8:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi Merri,

Were you thinking of having this published?

It has merit. I ended up reading it a couple of times; I love the rhythm.
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Merri



Joined: 21 Jun 2007
Posts: 30


Location: Victoria, Australia

PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 6:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

At today's reckoning, 34 people have read it here. That's probably more than would ever read it if I published my own book with it in! Laughing


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